The Rocky Road to Better

There’s something to be said about the way we live our lives and the varying strategies we each employ in order to survive and thrive in our respective physical, social and spiritual ecosystems.

We could just float and let life take us where it may but that can only happen to an extent. There has to be an impetus, an exercise of will, at some point or the only way we’ll be headed is down. Personally, I want to become better… in every aspect. Not perfect, but I do want to see an incremental positive change in my behaviour and my effect on others.

But, even though I maintain a positive attitude and fig my heels in to move myself forward. I stumble, I stop, I make a ton of mistakes, I fall backward… and it’s disheartening. But now, looking back at the times that happened, I realise all the setbacks were there to make me strengthen my resolve and I possibly wouldn’t have gotten to where I am right now without the stumbles and falls. They’re a significant part of the journey.

If I had to do it all again, I wouldn’t take away the rain ‘cos I know it’s made me who I am.

Faith Evans
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Focusing Somewhere Between Ideas and Events.

 

Drama. Everywhere.  You know where it starts and ends?  With people.

People discussing other people, judging other people, comparing themselves to other people, etc. etc.

I’m sure you must’ve come across this quote…

“Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

It’s been doing the rounds so much it’s become a cliché and, ironically, the quote itself is about people.  Anyway, it’s not just about “great minds”,  it’s about living a life that’s yours alone and free of worry. People are the root of the problem, or more specifically, your obsession and focus on other people.

Leave other people alone.

Focus on yourself.

Everything you will face in life will have less meaning and be far more difficult to overcome without knowledge of self, first and foremost.

Getting knowledge of self is the hard part. It involves self-reflection, understanding everything about yourself from the small things like your favourite colour and favourite food, to what you believe about why you are alive and what your purpose is on Earth. Why are you here? Why were you born?  You need to sit down alone, ask yourself these questions and answer them for yourself and be convinced by it.  This won’t be sorted out in a single sitting, it will take time… but in order to get the rest of your life sorted out you have to do it.

Next, you need to get into reading, watching and listening everything that will help you answer the questions you need to.   This is where we tie in the title…  Your life is made up of events and, more importantly, your reaction to events. Pay attention to the things that happen to you and around you… how are you reacting to them? why are you reacting in that way? Is it the right way to react (is it better for you in the long-term)? Start a Journal. Write this stuff down. Re-read it later.

Finally, ideas. This is the goldmine. The bigger the better. But, keep the focus on yourself, what’s important for you to understand and answer.  Philosophy, Religion, etc.  may seem boring in the face of TV series and endless memes. But go after everything be ruthless asking yourself the bigger questions, seeing what questions were asked and explored before you…

Why should you do this, exactly? What will you get out of it?  First, you will know yourself in such a way that no event, or person can affect your state of being. You will be able to stand on your own, hold yourself to a higher standard. Second, you’ll start to see reality for what it is rather than what you’d like it to be. You will start to understand how things really work underneath it all.  How the world runs, with you in it… and how you can really affect change, for yourself, within your circle of influence and the world.

Little by little, piece by piece, one step at a time.

Start now.

Just a final note: Once you start this journey, it doesn’t end… but you wouldn’t want it to. I guarantee it.

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