You can’t afford it…SO DON’T BUY IT! You Idiot.

I think this is a pretty cool reminder from Consumer Reports to all credit card holders over the festive season.  Especially in America… and especially given the trillions already tolled in American debt.

IF YOU CAN’T AFFORD IT, DON’T BUY IT! YOU BLOODY IDIOT.  I have this deep sadness for people who can’t see past their own short-term actions and then find themselves, over-weight, under-paid, swimming in debt and facing another mid-life crisis.

Big Up to Consumer Reports for the reminder… No Bailouts in the Credit Card Contract… you will be paying ALL OF IT back.

Link

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Credit Cards, Consumer Report, Bailout, Holidays, Christmas, Spending, Debt, American

Chuck Norris and the Global Credit Crisis

I got this on e-mail and found it Hilarious!

Chuck Norris can borrow at the discount window

Chuck Norris can sell $300bln in high yield loans before lunch

Chuck Norris’s curves are never inverted

Chuck Norris doesn’t hedge . He waits.

Chuck Norris doesn’t target inflation. He roundhouse-kicks it
until it begs for mercy.

The Chuck Norris dollar buys 3 Canadian dollars, and trades at
parity with the euro.

Chuck Norris doesn’t supply collateral, only collateral damage.

The tears of Chuck Norris would supply enough liquidity to solve
the credit crisis. Too bad he never cries.

When the yield on a Chuck Norris bond goes up, the price also
rises.

Chuck Norris trades on fear and greed simultaneously.

Alan Greenspan calls Chuck Norris “The Maestro.”

Chuck Norris has already banked his dividend payment from Northern
Rock Plc.

Chuck Norris doesn’t borrow at the Fed’s discount window. Chuck
Norris LENDS at the Fed’s discount window.

There is no market regulator. Just a list of securities Chuck
Norris allows to be traded.

Chuck Norris doesn’t buy gold to hedge against inflation. Gold
buys Chuck Norris to hedge against inflation.

Chuck Norris charges the Bank of England a penalty rate for
borrowing. And guarantees its deposits.

Chuck Norris gets ALL of his funding from the asset-backed
commercial paper market.

Chuck Norris doesn’t mark-to-market. The market marks to Chuck
Norris.

When the U.S. economy sneezes, the world catches a cold. When
Chuck Norris sneezes, the U.S. economy catches pneumonia.

Chuck Norris thinks Credit Crunch is a breakfast cereal

Chuck Norris isn’t a market maker; he IS the market.

Chuck Norris subprime collateralized debt obligations still trade
at 100 percent of face value.

Chuck Norris has a trade surplus with China.

Johannesburg Stock Exchange (JSE) launches Shariah Index

I-Net Bridge just published this today and I find it extremely interesting. Since the “Oasis Crescent Equity Fund” and Oasis’s other products doing so well in the market due to the shariah-compliant investing, which has attracted lots of Muslims and Non-Muslims alike. I guess it’s all in the spirit of that one uniting driving force of humanity, making money.

Here’s the story published below.

The JSE, in partnership with FTSE Group (FTSE), the global index provider, on Monday launched the FTSE/JSE Shariah Top 40 Index.

The index will open up many opportunities for those interested in Shariah compliant investment, including the 850 000 strong South African Muslim community, the JSE said.

The index is a selection of Shariah compliant companies from the FTSE/JSE Shariah All-Share Index. The calculation of the index and the treatment of corporate actions are similar to the FTSE/JSE Top 40.

“Internationally the market for Islamic investment products is growing exponentially, at an estimated 15-20% per annum,” said Ana Forssman, Senior General Manager: Information Products Sales at the JSE. “This index gives Muslim investors access to the top performing listed companies in South Africa without compromising religious beliefs. With approximately 1.5 billion Muslims worldwide, there is huge growth potential for investment vehicles with a faith-based mandate,” said Imogen Dillon Hatcher, Managing Director, EMEA – FTSE Group.

“Shariah compliant investment is one of the fastest growing new areas of finance globally. The FTSE/JSE Shariah Top 40 index will provide institutional investors with an accurate Shariah benchmark as well as help providers create structured investment products tailored to the Islamic market. Today’s launch demonstrates FTSE Group’s commitment to providing innovative solutions to investors both in South Africa and worldwide. ”

The constituents of the FTSE/JSE Shariah Top 40 Index are screened by Yasaar Research Inc, a well-respected authority on Shariah law. To qualify as a constituent of the index, companies undergo a detailed screening process, which filters out any organisations considered unacceptable or non-compliant according to Shariah-law, including businesses involved in conventional finance, alcohol, pork-related and non-halaal food, entertainment, tobacco and weapons.

The remaining companies are then further screened according to Shariah compliant financial criteria. In order to remain in the index, the companies are reassessed by Yasaar quarterly, the JSE said.

: JSE, Johannesburg Stock Exchange, Shariah, Investing, Index, Shariah-index

Post Office Swamped by Prospective Sasol Inzalo Shareholders.

Going to the post office is really irritating this past week. I want to apply to get my piece of the Sasol Inzalo Share offer which let’s people gain access to a nice slice of the pie of Sasol and secure their pension/retirement/spending-spree. The post office opens by 9am, I get there at 8am and there’s already a line going past three stores in the mall to get into the post office. I turn around, knowing it’s just not worth it.

It’s not that I’m impatient… it’s just that I was first in line the day before but was forced to leave unsatisfied because the system just kept on going down. Speaking to people in the queue, one lady waited there for 5 hours the day before, standing in a queue and was then sent home because the system still hadn’t come up yet. Very, very frustrating.

I did hear on the radio yesterday that they’ve extended the deadline from this Saturday to next Wednesday to apply for these shares and they did acknowledge their IT-related shortcomings.

Another interesting thing… this initiative which Sasol has launched was intended to help poor, disenfranchised black people get a chance at investing and securing a better future. When I was at the Post Office, I didn’t see a single black person in the line! I only saw a few coloured people and the rest were Indians! I found that fact a bit sad, but then again, according to law South Africa Indians are classified as black and who wouldn’t give up an opportunity like this? To get funded shares in a very good company with great potential…

Just some thoughts as I walked the mall back to my car to try again on Monday… maybe at 07h30 next time, with a magazine and an iPod so I don’t die of boredom.

Some more info @ …
Fin24
Moneyweb

: South African Post Office, Sasol Inzalo Shares, Money, Investing