Thoughts on My 30th Birthday…
Will we ever know how to really relate to our age? I think my confusion/apprehension (Can’t find the right word) comes from the mass media and movies where we’re blasted with age-defying creams, worried faces over “getting old” and the constant battle between “act your age” and “you’re only as young as you feel.”
Anyway, I’ve been on this planet for 30 years and I’m wondering what I have to show for it. What value have I added to this planet and to my fellow human beings? Have I uplifted anyone’s life? have I contributed to building something which will benefit people today, let alone future generations?
Bottom line: I don’t feel I’ve done enough, and I need to do more.
So my question to myself is this… what can I do to add more value? Where can I get involved and utilise my skills to make this world, or at least my world (i.e. my sphere of influence) a better place?
My answer is to constantly focus on making myself a better person – learning more, doing more to help wherever I see other’s need help but in a pro-active way, not a reactive way. Talking to people more… I’ve realised most of all people just want to be heard, so I should hear them out.
Whatever happens next, I hope I’m successful in this.
My Rant on the Purpose of Life.
I don’t know why they can’t see it. You know, the fact that this life is so temporary. They make it their “everything” and it isn’t. They’re killing for it on TV, all over the place… for gold and wealth and land. None of it’s their’s to begin with, they don’t really own it, they don’t own anything because when they die they can’t even take their own bodies with them. Ownership is an illusion.
I’m wondering if these people have ever stopped to think “What’s the point of my life?” Because it can’t be to screw people out of their savings or cause wars so that my people can drive SUV’s. I just can’t see how they could have got their priorities so messed up. And to make matters worse, they sincerely believe that they will not be held accountable for their actions. I believe they will be. It can’t be any other way, I believe EVERYONE will be held to account for the good and the bad they do in this life… otherwise there just can’t be any point.
Just to live, because we got here by some fluke of nature and evolved from amoeba’s and there’s no real purpose to life except to live “as best we can” and then die and turn to dust and that’s that. What a crock of shit. Who decides what’s the best way to live then? I can do whatever I want… rape, kill, thieve…. Because there is no consequence if that’s the philosophy to live by. No wonder they find it okay to steal people’s livelihoods, destroy nations and sit there with straight faces or wipe it away with little laughs of “oh, my I’ve made a booboo, haven’t I … ha ha ha”.
There is a flaw in the basic philosophy which is making the society the way it is.
Your “Health and Safety” Craze… is because of your fear of death.
Your Financial Crisis is because you fear the loss of your wealth.
And be sure…both will come true, you will die and you will lose your wealth because that is the way life works and people are tried in different ways. Wake up. These things are there in order to wake us up and live our lives better. You’ve used them to create your own hell on earth, and the one to come is waiting for those who squander the trust of others.
Recognise.
Review/Perspective: “Eat, Pray, Love”
Straight off, I was not totally impressed with the book. That is not to say I do not share an empathy with the subject matter. I see a lot of myself in the search Elizabeth goes through.
I am all for being open-minded, we will never know everything and there are many who know much more than we do. We do need to let go of all the petty things we cling to, what is really important? If you haven’t figured it out, what’s important to you right now? Nobody is ever fully right or fully wrong, there’s good and bad in everything and sometimes it’s only a matter of how you are looking at things.
I still can’t figure out why the book did not gel with me very well. I have read many self-help, zen, search/journey for the truth books and this one does not particularly stand out for me as one of the top ten. Maybe it’s only because of relevance, but I also feel there was something in the story which just does not click with me. I imagine it would with women, and especially women living in western societies, a whole lot. There may be oceans of relevance and mirrored reflections of thoughts, feelings and experiences.
Given all that, I love the journey itself. The intent behind it, the search for the truth, for something greater and the realisation that it starts with one’s self. Only one’s self, and it can not begin anywhere else. Outside holds no answers if the inside has not been reconciled. Elizabeth’s journey is just one of those journey’s and I can say it is one of many, by countless citizens of earth with varying resources who will suck up meaning from the greatness of mountains to the simplicity of children playing with marbles on a street corner.
The movie is coming out in the last third of this year , and it looks pretty good. I do think Julia Roberts is a great choice to play Elizabeth in the role and I suspect I will feel better about the movie than the book. Which would be the second time for me ( I always thought the Godfather movie trumped the book).
Above all, I love how the book left me with a feeling of confusion within myself, and that is ALWAYS a great place to start. Never doubt that. Go read the book for yourself, and when it comes out, watch the movie. There is a nugget of something great and personal in all of it.
Friend
Where were they when you was walking through the dark path of sorrow and unhealthy self-flagellation for your failures? The ones who laughed with you way back when you were at primary school, at high school and at university. The ones who rode the tide across the happy days, sucking on the smiles.
And now when the darkness has come, after the glory days… when you hit that hard wall of reality and suddenly nobody’s smiling because nobody’s there. Except you, and you’re not smiling either. All you see is this mountain to climb, a long road ahead with little provision. All you have is you.
Does it make you wonder then, that your REAL friends, even those who did help a little, could only go so far… does it not make you wonder at the fabric of your life? Cloth stitched with decision after decision and it’s all up to you. You, alone, can take the action necessary and you alone should accept the consequences, the responsibility. Accept it. Take the first step up that mountain, on that lonely road. The others, the ‘friends’, will follow you. But you have to lead yourself, and eventually them too, to the sunlit path of smiles and laughter.
You, are ultimately your only friend.
Recognise.
Stop Screaming.
He’s healthy. His mother loves him. He came into this world wet, beautiful and loud. Like most babies are. He glows in his tired mother’s arms… smiles and kisses everywhere. Love fills the room. He looks around his new world, he lives here now. This is life and his begins in noise, love and heat.
I wish I could tell him not to be afraid of anything. That everything will be okay. I want to tell him that he needs to pay attention, though. That sometimes he’ll feel just like the first time he came into this world. Change is scary. Change is life. He’ll scream again. Out of desperation, frustration, anger. He’ll also scream out of joy. Emotions run high and rampant and he will ride them, everywhere.
<this is just the beginning>
The Night-Time Prayer Fiasco
Was treated to an interesting bit of information just before taraweeh prayer (the special night-time Ramadan prayer) yesterday. Apparently some of the Muslims were being attacked with eggs while leaving the mosque after the taraweeh prayer. A black car (didn’t get all the details) driving around the Epsom mosque and blasting people walking home with eggs. Now that I think back, I was attacked as well… but they missed me.. I remember hearing a ‘Smack!’ while walking home, but they missed me… so I carried on walking… I remember a black car though.
Anyway… I have to give the Epsom Police here major props. The mosque executive members contacted the police gave them details etc. and within 24 hours of the report, the police commissioner (yeah the top dog) knew about it, placed cops outside the mosque, had unmarked cars parked on the road around the mosque, tracked down the car and arrested the perpetrators.
That bit of info blew me away… coming from South Africa where you hardly ever hear of cops working so fast, let alone catching any perpetrators, ever (well regarding crimes that happen particular to you) anyway. All I remember thinking was that I heard the one day that this was and the next day it was over. Guys caught, cops outside. Problem Solved. Damn… that was FAST.
Technorati Tags: Islam, Life, Taraweeh, Epsom, London
How to Live a Better Life.
Right.. now the list below is not something to look at say it’s really ‘cute’ and ‘true’ and forward it onto 30 other people. This is for you if you’re reading this. Do what you want to with it, but most importantly… JUST DO IT!
1. Take a 10-30 minutes walk every day. And while you walk, smile.
2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
3. Sleep for 7 hours.
4. Live with the 3 E’s — Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
5. Play more games.
6. Read more books than you did the previous year.
7. Make time to practice meditation, yoga, and prayer. They provide us with daily fuel for our busy lives.
8. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
9. Dream more while you are awake.
10. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
11. Drink plenty of water.
12. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
13. Don’t waste your precious energy on gossip.
14. Forget issues of the past. Don’t remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
15. Don’t have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
16. Realise that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
17. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
18. Smile and laugh more.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don’t hate others.
20. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
21. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
22. Make peace with your past so it won’t spoil the present.
23. Don’t compare your life to others’. You have no idea what their journey is all about. Don’t compare your partner with others.
24. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
25. Forgive everyone for everything.
26. What other people think of you is none of your business.
27. GOD heals everything.
28. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
29. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
30. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
31. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
32. The best is yet to come.
33. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
34. Do the right thing!
35. Call your family often.
36. Your inner most is always happy. So be happy.
37. Each day give something good to others.
38. Don’t over do. Keep your limits.
39. When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it.
40. Don’t be more calculative in your life for all things.
Stealing Second Base
“Progress always involves risks. You can’t steal second base and keep your foot on first.” – Frederick Wilcox
This is an aspect of all initiatives to move forward. You can’t get ahead if you’re still stuck where you are. You can’t expect anything different or better if you keep doing what you’re doing. First step of the change is to recognise where you are and make significant changes, either the environment you find yourself in, or the people that surround you, the habits you have, the things you keep on doing. Recognise it and change it.
It’s not easy and it is a challenge. That’s the point. If you’re comfortable, that’s when you should be worried. That’s when you get hit out of the blue with the unexpected. If you don’t wake up yourself to the reality that things keep changing and you need to change with them, Life will Smack you upside your head and then you’ll be forced to change, which is even harder then if you chose the path yourself.
Ready? Go.
Technorati Tags: Life, Philosophy, Stealing Second Base
Happy Birthday Madiba!
I had posted a full thought piece at Instablogs entitled
A Lesson on Madiba’s 90th Birthday
In summary…
Mandela was a great man but he was also an ordinary man, by his own admission, who found himself in extraordinary circumstances. His values shown throughout his life and his struggle against apartheid. We too face situations which are extraordinary and show us for what we truly are. So let’s strive to be the best human beings we can be and strive for the greatest ideals so that when we are faced with a situation, our truth will shine.
: Mandela, 90th Birthday, Philosophy, Lesson, Life
If You Could Spend 10 Bucks to Make Someone Smile, Would You Do It?
Of course you would. (If not… well, you should.)
On the weekend as I was parking my car and got out to pay for the parking, this car guard came up to me and offered his assistance, he was all smiles and courtesy. I didn’t have the change for the parking meter so he stuck with me and took me to a store where I could get the change I needed. I only needed R2 for the parking and then said to myself “What the hell… he definitely needs it more than I do and he was really helpful.” So I gave him R10 and at that moment I saw the most sincere smile ever and heard the mot gracious thanks I probably have ever received. It was more than just the expression on his face and the words, I just felt it.
A little later it hit me… it was just R10. Something I wouldn’t miss if I lost it and yet it meant the world to this one person. This has been an age old tale and has happened in a myriad of circumstances across the globe, across the ages and yet it never loses its impact when it happens. The measure of things. The way seemingly minuscule things, according to us, affect the world around us in the most profound way. It’s not limited to money either, a thank you, a smile, opening the door for someone, complimenting someone, all these have the most profound influence on people and our environment.
This phenomenon has been proven scientifically by the way. It’s called Chaos Theory, the main point of which is that the smallest of actions can have the greatest of consequences… a butterfly flapping its wings in South Africa can cause a tornado in Hong Kong (there’s an ad based on this for an investment company talking about investment potential… clever.)
I think I digressed a bit from my main point which is that we’ve lost this concept in our modern technology-driven world. We rarely pay attention to how our seemingly meaningless actions are transforming the world around us and affecting the people we interact with. Worse, we rarely do the little things which make small differences in our environment and lift the spirits of those around us in even the smallest way.
We need to change that. So start today. Smile at someone, thank someone. Commit some act of random kindness :)
Technorati Tags: Car Guard, Philosophy, Life, Smile, Little Things
