On Killing Demons…

Everybody has their own demons which torment either from time to time or constantly.  There is this struggle which I am constantly struggling to define and pin down and then find ways of slaughtering the incessant bastard.  I’ve boiled it down like this…  You have behavioural demons like that of bad habits  i.e. procrastination, cussing too much, nail-biting, etc.  and then you have the deeper demons which generally also lead to the behavioural ones; these are the bigger questions, the mind-numbing or sometimes mind-buzzing cacophony that goes on in your head. 

The deeper questions which are personal to me are questions like:

"Why am I here?" (something I constantly need to ask to remind me of my purpose on this Earth)
but also tied into that "Why am I me?" (What is the purpose of my unique consciousness?)
"What do I do now?"
"What do I want to achieve?"

There are more but let’s not get sidetracked.  This was about Slaying these demons.  Here’s a few tips.

1) Gain Knowledge and never stop learning.  ALWAYS ASK QUESTIONS.
2) Control yourself. Listen and focus on your actions and thoughts and decisions. KNOW YOURSELF and be truthful with yourself about your weaknesses and strengths. LEARN WHAT YOU NEED TO CHANGE.
3) TAKE ACTION to change things.

The most important part of the above in particular is to pay attention to your desires. What do you lust after… these are often the evil horseman, which when let loose and fall into excess, create some horrible characteristics and make us become the people we often depsise the most.

Remember that you can’t blame anyone else for your situation or who you are. Wherever you are right now and whoever you are, you have made yourself.  If you look in the mirror and don’t like what you see, you can decide to change, and only you can do that.

So go and do it. Slay the demon.  Your one decision to focus on this and change even a single thing about yourself for the better will be like a Hattori Hanzo sword striking a deadly (or heavily injurious) blow to your greatest opponent… your weaker self.

Quotidian Miracles

Do you realise how many things in everyday life hang by a thread? I’ve been reading a lot of things scientific around our physical existence and a common element strikes me, the spiritual connotations of which get my mind racing around like a freight train running on nitrous oxide.

Here’s a few thoughts…

1) The Three phases of Water… do you have any idea what factors need to be in play for it to be possible just to have water in the form of solid, liquid and gas?… and it just happens to be fundamental to our existence.

2) Tectonic plates… Water in three phases is not all. The movement of our tectonic plates, and with it volcanoes, earthquakes, etc. are essential to managing the Earth’s temperature… without which, human life on the planet would not exist.

3) Day and Night… Apart from the fact that we just happen to be the perfect distance from the earth to sustain life on the planet with the Sun’s energy as well as contribute to the maintenance of the Earth’s temperature… the mere fact that the system revolves around us having a period of rest and work, Light and Darkness makes the Earth work and rest just as we do.

Right… now forget all the Scientific stuff… the temperature, the rest and work, the fact that we just happen to have all these things in a perfect balance and I haven’t even mentioned all of them. They also have an effect on our social atmosphere, health, behaviour. Again, all of which affect our ability to adequately LIVE on this planet.

It seems to me a bit convenient for all these critical elements which keep us alive to be a coincidence. At just how many ‘coincidences’ will we draw the line before we acknowledge the design?

What is it with Authors named Murakami and Psycho-Sexual Thrillers?

Up until this point far I’ve read two novels by Haruki Murakami (The Wind-up Bird Chronicle and After Dark) and one by Ryu Murakami (Piercing) and I’m beginning to notice a sinister underlying theme with these Japanese authors.

Firstly, you cannot doubt the dark angle and twist of the stories involved. There is some sick twisted element to all of it which makes it both enticing but revolting at the same time. Secondly, the characters are always normal people with some deep flaw or tortured soul or whatever else it is which makes them 1) act really weird and 2) have some crazy, CRAZY thoughts.

After reading Haruki’s work and all the reviews, etc. I was intrigued and thought the books were ‘cool’ in that underbelly-of-society type of way… but after that, when all the books I’m reading by them tend to be about generally some sort of excessively deviant behaviour and just plain weird shit, I’m starting to question what the point of it all really is.

I do want a point, a moral, a lesson… something I can learn from it apart from being thoroughly freaked out by these crazy motherfuckers these authors seem to come up with.

I think I’ll try one more by Haruki before trying some other sub-cultural authors for different countries. Stieg Larsson (Swedish) also had some crazy elements but at least his work had a golden thread of a story to follow through to the end.

One thing I have to admit is the breadth of imagination these guys seem to have, albeit towards the fringes of darkness and insanity, I’m wondering if a similar movement of authors are available focusing on the more… positive side of life. The search begins.

Gentlemen, A Call to Arms! The Expendables vs. Eat, Pray, Love.

I Love this. How absolutely honest. So enough bitching on Facebook and Twitter about the nauseating sparkly vampires and how your wife/Significant Other has forced you to watch yet another one of the barrage of chick flick which have flooded the scene.

It’s time you got off your ass and put your money where your mouth is. Prove you’re a man!

Gentlemen, it’s time we get out a bit more. By its 2nd week Rambo was beaten by 27 Dresses and Hanna Montana. Stallone ripped a man’s throat out with his bare hands! We can’t let this happen again.

Eclipse: An Objective View (Well, I’ll try)

One thing you have to keep in mind when watching movies is that they are very similar to products. They have a specific target market. So to be true to any particular movie you will have to judge it not only from a “movie buff” perspective but also from the perspective of “is it good for the target market”.

So when it comes to Eclipse… let’s face it, The movie (and the franchise) is an amazing success. It’s not secret who the target market is either (the throng of giggling teenage girls at the cinema when it premièred is testament to this).

So my likes and dislikes about the movie?

1) Rosalie’s story about how she became a vampire could’ve been done much MUCH better. From reading the book, I was expecting Kill Bill style action around the story of revenge. I think an entire movie can be made around this one.

2) Anyone else notice Bella has Buckteeth? Damn those incisors were huge.

3) Bella is a ho. No other girl would be tolerated running around kissing two boys and getting away with it. Also, you can notice Stephenie Meyer’s mormon beliefs coming through with all the sexual tension and Edward’s view of getting married first, etc. To me it’s all just very confusing.

4) The Cullen’s look AWESOME when they stand together in all their vampire paleness awaiting a vampire army onslaught. I really liked the beauty of that picture.

5) The Werewolve/Vampire Fight was pretty good. But then again, we had to wade through a lot of soppy lovey-dovey stuff and a LOT of sexual tension before we got there.

Okay so after this… what do you have to look forward to from the next set… Well, from what I heard from all the conversations after the flick… “I can’t wait to see the wedding!”

That should give you enough insight into who the target market is and it all can get very nauseating.

Enjoy.

The Chilean Connection

The more time I spend in this Santiago the more I see the resemblance of so many disaffected developing countries with parts of town in urban decay and others in great development. I get images of Johannesburg town, Pretoria – specifically Marabastad, Durban town. Specifically South African Urban centres come to mind since that is my experience. Not so much London because London is first-world very clean and tidy urban settings. Even the decaying parts just don’t have the same feeling I get in South African and now in Santiago.

Pictures speak louder than words… I will need to find time to upload them. Right now the ‘official’ summit is over but the Global Voices meetings and breakaways are going to continue throughout the weekend. I’ve made a lot of new lifetime friends and am grateful to just be here.

Here’s the Flickr SlideShow for the GV Summit 2010…

Touchdown Santiago

Touched down in Santiago at 11.40am local time. Back in the UK that’s 4.40pm. The 5 hour difference is driving my body insane, sleepy but it’s still too early. The trip itself was a blur, 13 hour flight with intermittent sleep, I remember watching The Departed somewhere in between. The flight was via Sao Paulo, I would’ve loved to see Brazil, the airport seems to be in the middle of the city because you can see houses and trees and mountains just outside the airport, and the sun was lovely.

I remember walking through the airport half in a daze with Paris and Public Enemy’s Remixed version of “Rebirth of a Nation” on my iPod trying to find my way to the “Connecting Flights” Section. Met some awesome people, all from Global Voices. Egypt, Tanzania, Macedonia, Fiji, Bangladesh, Japan, China, USA, Pakistan, India, Bolivia, Madagascar… and there’s going to be many more to meet tomorrow at the Summit itself.

Santiago is a big ass city, like all big ass cities, tall buildings with bustling people back and forth. In terms of culture and scenery its like a mix between Johannesburg and Egypt. Everyone speaks Spanish and I constantly chastise myself for not learning the language more. I have worse than basics to work with. I love it though, the city I mean, That constant buzz and noise and life just filtering all around me, I can sit mesmerised by it for ages.

I’m sitting in the hotel room taking advantage of the intermittent wi-fi and buzzing with excitement at the prospect of tomorrow’s Global Voices Citizen Media Summit. It’s gonna be HUGE.

Review/Perspective: “Eat, Pray, Love”

Straight off, I was not totally impressed with the book. That is not to say I do not share an empathy with the subject matter. I see a lot of myself in the search Elizabeth goes through.

I am all for being open-minded, we will never know everything and there are many who know much more than we do. We do need to let go of all the petty things we cling to, what is really important? If you haven’t figured it out, what’s important to you right now? Nobody is ever fully right or fully wrong, there’s good and bad in everything and sometimes it’s only a matter of how you are looking at things.

I still can’t figure out why the book did not gel with me very well. I have read many self-help, zen, search/journey for the truth books and this one does not particularly stand out for me as one of the top ten. Maybe it’s only because of relevance, but I also feel there was something in the story which just does not click with me. I imagine it would with women, and especially women living in western societies, a whole lot. There may be oceans of relevance and mirrored reflections of thoughts, feelings and experiences.

Given all that, I love the journey itself. The intent behind it, the search for the truth, for something greater and the realisation that it starts with one’s self. Only one’s self, and it can not begin anywhere else. Outside holds no answers if the inside has not been reconciled. Elizabeth’s journey is just one of those journey’s and I can say it is one of many, by countless citizens of earth with varying resources who will suck up meaning from the greatness of mountains to the simplicity of children playing with marbles on a street corner.

The movie is coming out in the last third of this year , and it looks pretty good. I do think Julia Roberts is a great choice to play Elizabeth in the role and I suspect I will feel better about the movie than the book. Which would be the second time for me ( I always thought the Godfather movie trumped the book).

Above all, I love how the book left me with a feeling of confusion within myself, and that is ALWAYS a great place to start. Never doubt that. Go read the book for yourself, and when it comes out, watch the movie. There is a nugget of something great and personal in all of it.

Friend

Where were they when you was walking through the dark path of sorrow and unhealthy self-flagellation for your failures? The ones who laughed with you way back when you were at primary school, at high school and at university. The ones who rode the tide across the happy days, sucking on the smiles.

And now when the darkness has come, after the glory days… when you hit that hard wall of reality and suddenly nobody’s smiling because nobody’s there. Except you, and you’re not smiling either. All you see is this mountain to climb, a long road ahead with little provision. All you have is you.

Does it make you wonder then, that your REAL friends, even those who did help a little, could only go so far… does it not make you wonder at the fabric of your life? Cloth stitched with decision after decision and it’s all up to you. You, alone, can take the action necessary and you alone should accept the consequences, the responsibility. Accept it. Take the first step up that mountain, on that lonely road.  The others, the ‘friends’, will follow you. But you have to lead yourself, and eventually them too, to the sunlit path of smiles and laughter.

You, are ultimately your only friend.

Recognise.

Stop Screaming.

He’s healthy. His mother loves him.  He came into this world wet, beautiful and loud. Like most babies are. He glows in his tired mother’s arms… smiles and kisses everywhere. Love fills the room.  He looks around his new world, he lives here now. This is life and his begins in noise, love and heat. 

I wish I could tell him not to be afraid of anything. That everything will be okay. I want to tell him that he needs to pay attention, though.  That sometimes he’ll feel just like the first time he came into this world. Change is scary. Change is life.  He’ll scream again. Out of desperation, frustration, anger. He’ll also scream out of joy. Emotions run high and rampant and he will ride them, everywhere.

<this is just the beginning>

« Previous Page — Next Page »